


Want and Need

by Ruquas



Series: Requests [1]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: BDSM, Clint Barton Needs a Hug, Dom/sub, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Miscommunication, Paddling, Pre-Avengers (2012), Punishment, Subdrop, Touch-Starved
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-08
Updated: 2019-07-08
Packaged: 2020-06-24 20:43:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,463
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19731427
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ruquas/pseuds/Ruquas
Summary: Clint had agreed. He didn‘t really need anything and it was nice that he didn‘t need to guess when he was allowed to say what he wanted. It was easy.He just didn‘t know what it was that missed.





	Want and Need

**Author's Note:**

  * For [hauntedhousewif3](https://archiveofourown.org/users/hauntedhousewif3/gifts).



> This fic was a request from [spewonyou2](https://archiveofourown.org/users/spewonyou2/pseuds/spewonyou2). I hope you like it!

It started… well, Clint wouldn‘t say easy. It started rocky, with him stuttering and Nick Fury just looking unimpressed. It probably started just like everyone and no one expected.

Clint even got a raised eyebrow out of Natasha when he learned that Clint was now in a relationship with Nick Fury! A raised eyebrow!

And it just got better when Clint asked Nick if he would be willing to be a more… dominant person (well, _even more dominant_ ) not only in the bedroom but also outside of it and Nick had agreed, as long as they talked about it and put down some ground rules. Clint had agreed. Of course, he did. It was perfect, so it didn‘t matter if he never had such a talk. He thought he did pretty good for his first time negotiating.

When Nick had explained that he didn‘t care for sex most times when they had a scene Clint had been confused, but Nick had also explained that, for him, those two were just not connected with each other most times. That was okay, Nick didn‘t mind that for Clint it was sexual. 

Of course, it wasn‘t something Clint could have forever, he knew that from the start. He got everything he wanted so it was just natural that there was a catch, something he didn‘t understand. He had once asked Nick if there was a catch and Nick had just asked him if he really thought that low of him. Clint hadn‘t asked again. Of course, he didn‘t. He just wanted to hear that Nick wasn‘t just in it because… hell, Clint didn‘t even know what Nick could get out of it. But there had to be something or otherwise, he would be just discharged one day and he really didn‘t want that.

And then it fell apart when they took it further, agreed that they would always be dominant and submissive when they were alone, not just in the bedroom. It all started with a new rule.

„I don‘t want to know what you want, Clint, except when I ask you, got it? There‘s a difference between _need_ and _want_. I‘ll check on a regular basis if there‘s something you want, don‘t worry. But I will more often ask what you need and I trust you to tell me the truth.“, Nick had explained before he added; 

„And I expect that you tell me when you need something. No matter what I‘m doing, no matter what we are doing or where we are. I need to know if you need anything because I don‘t want this to fail, don't want us to fail. Okay?“

Clint had agreed. He didn‘t really need anything and it was nice that he didn‘t need to guess when he was allowed to say what he wanted. It was easy.

He just didn‘t know what it was that missed.

~*~*~

„Such a good boy.“, Sir whispered while Clint knelt in front of him, panting, vision blurred from the tears, back and ass hurting from the flogger, his head kind of fuzzy. He loved that feeling. Sir had called it subspace and Clint was really happy that Sir allowed him to have that. Almost as nice as touching, but sadly, Sir didn‘t do it that often when he was in subspace. Clint knew it was his own fault, he sometimes flinched away. Still, it would be nice to be touched now. He wanted that.

„You have earned yourself a reward.“, Sir murmured and wiped away a tear on Clint‘s face. He really wanted to chase the warm touch but stayed still. Sir loved it when he followed orders and the order had been to stay still until Sir said otherwise.

„Thank you, Sir.“

„What do you need, Clint?“

Clint whimpered. Thinking was hard, now even more than in other situations. Sadly, Sir didn‘t ask what he wanted, he really wanted to be petted.

„May… I have an orgasm, please, Sir?“, Clint asked because Sir hadn‘t allowed him to come from the flogging and his balls ached. Sir smiled shortly at him before he nodded, reaching down and clasping his hand about Clint‘s hurting cock.

Touching and an orgasm! Clint almost came as soon as Sir touched him, babbling his thanks. Such a shame that Sir pulled away when Clint was finished.

~*~*~

„Sir?“

Nick sighed and looked up. This day had been hell for almost forty agents, excluding Coulson and Nick. Both had to handle the aftermath of the mission and the fallout. A special kind of hell. Fury probably just really wanted to finish and then go straight home. He didn‘t have time for Clint, and he got it, really. He just… wanted to be near his boyfriend. Dominant. Whatever they were.

„What is it, Barton?“, Nick asked, exhaustion audible. Clint swallowed. Nick made time even though Clint knew that he probably drowned in paperwork. He knew that Nick‘s secretary just refused to answer any calls. And Clint disturbed him…

„Just wanted to know if you need anything else or if I‘m good to go. I can cook if you‘d like?“, he offered because Nick always liked it when Clint cooked and most times he got cuddled afterward, even though Nick would probably deny it if someone asked him. The man liked to cuddle.

Nick shook his head and Clint tried to swallow the disappointment down.

„Don‘t bother, Clint. I don‘t think I‘ll get home before… I don‘t know, next decade if the papers and calls come in like that. But thank you.“

Clint nodded and winked at Nick just because he could. Winking meant that he was okay and not disappointed.

~*~*~

The loud crack from the paddle across his ass let him jump more than the pain. Clint knew that this was just the first one. The crack that told him what to expect out of his punishment. It hurt like hell. The next twenty-four blows would hurt even more.

„I said count, boy. Cat got your tongue now?“, Sir asked, voice cold and Clint couldn‘t help the tears that rolled down his cheeks.

„No Sir. One, thank you, Sir.“, Clint whispered, hissing when the next hit came down pulling on the restraints, counting until Sir suddenly stopped for a short while.

„Now tell me why you‘re getting punished.“, Sir said, probably just looking down at Clint.

Clint swallowed, shame and guilt rising up again.

„Because I… I touched myself without permission.“

A harsh slap, this time with the hand, left Clint screaming. He still tried to raise his ass, get the hand to touch him again.

„Five more for moving, without permission. What else?“, Sir asked and Clint sobbed.

„I don‘t know Sir.“

And wasn‘t that the truth. He knew that he hadn‘t been allowed to touch himself, knew that he always had to ask first. And now he disappointed Sir even further with moving and with being stupid.

„For having an orgasm without permission. How many blows are left, boy?“

Clint swallowed and closed his eyes.

„Ten, Sir. Please, may I have those ten more with the paddle?“

Without answering Sir just landed the next blow, letting Clint count. He knew that Sir would just start over when Clint didn‘t count fast enough or even forgot to count or where they were! The blows weren‘t even the worst thing, because he knew that Sir had already put down the dog bed Clint sometimes slept in. Most days he liked it. It was big and soft and let him feel just a bit more submissive. Today, though, he wouldn‘t be allowed in the bed and he really didn‘t know how he would be able to survive that. He just wanted to be good.

When the blows stopped, Clint didn‘t even cry anymore.

„I‘m sorry, Sir, I am so sorry.“, he whispered, throat dry. Sir just loosened the restraints and grabbed Clint‘s hair in one fist, pulling him over to the dog bed.

„I know, darling. That‘s what punishment is for, and when it‘s over everything is fine again.“, Sir said, voice a bit softer. Clint curled into himself, pulling the blanket over him when Sir‘s hand disappeared, feeling bad when he saw that Sir knelt down in front of him. Sir got hurt on a mission, Sir shouldn‘t need to kneel down for his sub.

„Do you need anything?“

Clint shook his head, thankful that Sir just nodded and stood up again without making Clint use his words. A few more tears fell down on the dog bed while he listened to the sounds that Sir made while he made himself ready for bed. All the while remembering the touch from Sir, even though it had hurt. Just like the slap with the hand. He would do everything to have Sir touch him at the moment, he just wanted to feel Sir‘s body warmth. Then suddenly, the sounds disappeared and Sir walked over to the bed.

„Are you sure that you don‘t need anything? You know that just because you get punished it doesn‘t mean that you‘re not important? And that you can always, _always_ say your safeword?“, Sir asked again and Clint nodded. He had asked for punishments. Because when he got them he knew that Sir wanted to be with him for a little bit longer.

„Yes Sir, I know Sir. Everything fine, I don‘t need anything.“, he croaked, closing his eyes. Tomorrow, Sir would touch him, pet him. He could wait until then.

~*~*~

When he woke up, Nick was disorientated. He never woke up in the middle of the night, at least not in his own home. After a few seconds, he realized what had woken him up. Sobbing.

Without even realizing he had moved, Nick was already in the corner where he had put the dog bed for Clint for the night, making sure Clint could always see him, knowing that he wasn‘t left alone. He hadn‘t said it, but Nick just _knew_ that being left alone was a big red flag for Clint.

And still, even though they had talked about the punishment and Clint had agreed to it, there was something wrong.

„Clint?“, he asked, careful to have his hands where Clint could see them. Even without the touching issue, Clint was a dangerous man. They hadn‘t hired him for nothing.

Clint flinched and Nick had to swallow down the rising bile. He knew a subdrop when he saw one, and this was one. Fuck.

„S… sorry, Sir, didn‘t… I didn‘t want to… I‘m sorry… I‘ll be quiet.“, Clint whispered, looking at him with those big eyes. Nick shook his head, inching forward.

„No, darling, You‘re having a subdrop. Would it be okay if I touch you? You can say no.“

When Clint just stared at him he decided to try his luck and touched Clint‘s cheek, surprised at the mix of sobbing and mewling that came out of the younger man, who leaned into the touch like a kitten – just to flinch back, curling as fast in the corner as possible, eyes trembling with fear.

He had the sinking feeling that whatever had happened, it wasn‘t only his fault, it was also something that had damaged Clint.

„Sorry… I didn‘t mean to, Sir. I‘m sorry that I woke you up.“, Clint croaked.

„It‘s okay, darling. You‘re more important for me. More importan than a few hours of sleep. No touching now?“, he asked still awkwardly crouching in front of Clint and holy hell, he hadn‘t expected that a simple question could cause someone so much tears. Clint started sobbing again, pulling the blanket even tighter and Nick couldn‘t even start to pretend that the bruises made it easier. He really didn‘t want to use force to get Clint out of the corner, but if he continued like this, Nick probably had to. And he really didn‘t want to give the younger man another reason to distrust him at the moment.

„Please…“, Clint whispered, shooting a longing look at his hand before shaking his head.

„Oh, fuck.“, Nick cursed and winced when Clint whimpered.

„Not you, darling. I‘m not mad at you. And I‘m really sorry for what I‘m going to do now.“, Nick said, trying to stay calm while he reached for Clint‘s arm and just pulled the other man towards Nick, ignoring the way Clint shook his head while babbling something incoherent, the only word he could understand being ‚Sorry‘. 

„I‘ll be better, Sir, please, I promise.“, Clint said, again and again, pressing into the petting. Nick doubted that Clint even _knew_ that he did it. A fist closed around his heart, but he still had to test his theory.

„Clint, what do you need? You can name anything, and if it‘s possible you get it.“

Clint just shook his head, sniffling.

„Don‘t… don‘t need anything, Sir, thank you, Sir.“

„Okay. And what do you want now, Clint?“

Just like he expected the other man froze.

„S…Sir?“

„I asked you a question.“, Nick said, ignoring the way the fist around his heart began to pull at his heart.

„Just touching, Sir. That‘s nice, I‘d like that to continue if Sir wants to, if Sir allows it It just feels so nice Sir.“, Clint murmured after a few seconds and he fist ripped his heart out of his chest.

Of course, Clint wouldn‘t realize that he needed the touching, would think it was just something irrelevant that people decided to want.

He was an idiot. A poor excuse for a dominant. He didn't even saw what his sub obviously needed so desperately. Nick cursed silently in his head.

„Stand up, darling. You‘re allowed in the bed again.“

Clint looked at him, panic in his eyes.

„No, Sir, no, the punishment…“, Clint said but Nick just pulled him up.

„You‘re still dropping. You‘re not allowed to be alone or on the floor while you're dropping, got it?“

Clint nodded while Nick pushed him on the bed, pulled the covers above them, never breaking body contact.

„Clint, do you know the difference between what you want and what you need?“, Nick asked after a few minutes, still petting the younger man. He was almost convinced that Clint fell asleep before he felt light shaking.

„I… don‘t think so, Sir. Not if you ask it like that.“

Nick nodded, barely preventing the sigh that was in his throat.

„You like it when I pet you?“

„Yes, Sir. Thank you, Sir.“, Clint murmured.

„Feels safe and nice and warm. Feels like you care. Nice feeling, want to keep it. Nice to know to be wanted.“, Clint slurred before his breathing evened out.

Nick let out the sigh, stopping the petting but not removing his hand. They would need to have a really long talk in the morning.

**Author's Note:**

> You can find [my Tumblr here](https://ruquas-dreambell.tumblr.com/). If you have a request or anything, just let me know it there :)


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